Don't Cap Your Own Capacity

“Well I’m and artist in ministry. I’ll always be scraping by financially. That’s okay. I just have to get used to living with three people in a tiny apartment. I just have to be ok with timing my creativity around their schedules so it’s not interrupted. I can survive hitching rides and borrowing computers. It’s all in the name of art and justice so I can suck it up and scrape by!” This was a normal thought process for me. That was until I picked up the book Smart Talk by Lou Tice. In this book my martyr-minded thoughts were placed on the chopping block and hacked to pieces. This wasn’t about the “prosperity gospel” it was about claiming the lifestyle and tools I needed to serve and bless other people at the capacity I was meant to!

As I read my mind began to take on a new form. Suddenly I began to see things from a different perspective. Instead of thinking, “Oh well I don’t need that, I can scrape by just fine,” I started thinking “No I need that because I could reach so many more people with that space, that tool, that vehicle!” What if I had a room to myself? How much more writing or art or ideas could I create than I could tripping over other peoples stuff, having polite conversations with the constant stream of people coming in and out of our apartment, and piling my artwork in one corner of the apartment that I pray no one touches. How many more people could I bless if I could easily get to service projects, give people rides, get to important meetings in my own car instead of bumming rides and spending twice as much time waiting for a bus? How many more designs, blogs, newsletters and scripts could I come up with if I had a nice laptop instead of borrowed computers that cut off the internet every 10min or freeze up when 2 browser windows are open?

I don’t want to upgrade and expand my lifestyle to be selfish and to gain status and fame, I want to upgrade so that I can do more for people. This was just the beginning of my journey into the Smart Talk world and already my blood was running a little faster; doing laps around my imagination. I began to envision the simple uncluttered and efficient lifestyle that I could have- that I would have- so I could better fight injustice and rescue those gripped by cruel fists. What about you? Are there limitations you’ve been putting on yourself because you feel like it’d be selfish to want more? If you are motivated by love, don't cap your own capacity.

-Jewel Hargrove

CDM Teammate